The lighter side of Insurance

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I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat found that I had a fractured skull.

Arguing with an insurance adjuster is like wrestling a pig in the mud……After a while, you realize he likes it.

What´s the best thing about turning 65? No more calls from direct insurance agents.

“You ought to feel highly honoured,” said the businessman to the life insurance agent, “so far today I have had my secretary turn away seven insurance agents.” “Yes, I know,” replied the agent, “I´m them.”

If a risk manager, a broker and an underwriter were all drowning and you could only save one of them, which would you do first? Go to lunch; or Read the paper.

Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don’t have.

I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment.

I thought my window was down, but I found it was up when I put my head through it.

As I approached an intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.

In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.

I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows.

The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of the way when I struck the front end.

I pulled in to the side of the road because there was smoke coming from under the hood. I realized there was a fire in the engine, so I took my dog and smothered it with a blanket.

The claimant had collided with a cow. The questions and answers on the claim form were – Q: What warning was given by you? A: Horn. Q: What warning was given by the other party? A: Moo.

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